11 Mar 09 WINDOWS 7 Southern EDITION
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the WINDOWS 7 Southern EDITION may have accidentally been shipped outside of the south.
If you have one of these, you may need help understanding the commands.
The Southern EDITION may be recognized by the unique opening screen.
It reads: WINDERS 7, With a background picture of Waylon and Willie, superimposed on a bottle of Jack Daniels.
Please also note:
The Recycle Bin is now labeled ‘ Outhouse’
My Computer is called ‘This Dern Contraption’
Dial Up Networking is called ‘Good Ol’ Boys’
Control Panel is known as ‘ The Dashboard’
Hard Drive is referred to as ’4-Wheel Drive’
Floppies are ‘Them little ol’ plastic thang s’
Error message Popups now read ‘Duct Tape’
CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN THE Southern EDITION :
Cancel . Stopdat
Reset ………………… Try’er agin
Yes ………………………………. Yep
No ………………. Nope
Find ………………………. Hunt Fer’t
Go to ……………………… Over Yonder
Back …………… Back Yonder
Help . Gimme a Han’ Here
Stop ………….. Now kwit thet (WHOA!)
Start .. Crank’er Up
Settings …………. Settins
Programs ……….. Stuff Wut Duz Stuff
Documents ….. Stuff Ah Dun Did
Also note that
The Southern EDITION does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks.
Some programs that are exclusive to WINDERS 7:
Tipe-riter ……….. A word processing program
Cullerin’ Book …………… A graphics program
Cowntin’ Mersheen …… Calculator
Outhouse Paper …………………….. Notepad
Inner-net ………………… Microsoft explorer 5.0
Pitchers ………………………. A graphics viewer
We regret any inconvenience it may have caused. If you received a copy of The Southern EDITION,
You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.
Tags: agin, capital letters, contraption, dial up networking, duct tape, floppies, good ol boys, graphics program, graphics viewer, inconvenience, jack daniels, microsoft explorer, outhouse, pitchers, punctuation marks, tape changes, tipe, waylon and willie, winders, word processing program
31 Jul 08 Disaster Survival Kit
You’ve read this in lots of places, I’m sure, but it never hurts to read it again.
Getting a Survival kit together.
Get the following items together. Preferably put them into a large box or crate that you can transport to your vehicle easily and quickly. Check all the items every six months to make sure that they’re all still good, wholesome, and not expired.
The most important thing is probably fresh water. Minimum recommendation is one gallon person for a minimum of three days.
If you take any prescription drugs make sure you have at least a weeks worth on hand to take with you.
A first aid kit with bandages, some aspirin and some antibacterial wipes or cream is a good idea.
Toilet paper and soap. Nothing worse than being caught short without at least one roll!
Some food that is non-perishable, such as canned vegetables, fruit juice, spam, etc. Foodstuffs that have a long shelf life without refrigeration, and require no cooking are best. Remember to pack a can opener!
Take a radio, some screwdrivers, and a wrench, duct tape, a flashlight, and a stock of batteries.
Have some cash put aside. ATM networks will often be down, and also you may have to pay in cash, as the banking system may well be down too, and unable to process cards.
Work out a plan. Have an emergency contact – someone preferably out of the local area, that you can each call, if you get separated.
Make sure you know the evacuation routes from your area. A knowledge of CPR can be useful. Get a weather radio.
If you have a pet don’t forget to pack a survival kit for them too. Find out where you leave a pet safely if you can’t take them with you to a shelter.
Studies have shown that those folks that have a plan in place, are better able to weather the storm should it arrive.
Tags: antibacterial wipes, atm networks, bandages, banking system, can opener, canned vegetables, duct tape, earthquakes, emergency contact, first aid kit, flashlight, foodstuffs, fresh water, fruit juice, hurricanes, natural disasters, prescription drugs, refrigeration, screwdrivers, shelf life, survival kit, toilet paper, tornadoes, weather radio
