01 Feb 11 Father Of My Kids
Guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says “Hello!!!”. He’s rather taken aback because he can’t place where he knows her from. So he says…”do you know me???”… to which she replies…” I think you’re the father of one of my kids”….
Completely shocked…the guy’s mind travels back to the only time when he was unfaithful to his wife and
says…” My God!… are you the stripper from my bachelor party that i made love to on the pool table???!!”
Confused… she looks into his eyes and says calmly…” No… I am your son’s teacher”
Tags: attractive woman, bachelor party, god, pool table, stripper, supermarket, teacher father
13 Dec 10 Religious Truths
During these serious and troubled times, people of all faiths should remember these four great religious truths:
1.. Muslims do not recognize Jews as God’s Chosen People.
2.. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
3.. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian world.
4.. Baptists do not recognize each other at the liquor store.
Tags: all faiths, baptists, god, jesus, jews, liquor store, messiah 3, muslims, protestants, religious truths, troubled times
06 Dec 10 Petrol is Expensive?
Compared with Petrol……
Think a gallon of petrol is expensive?
This makes one think, and also puts things in perspective.
Diet Snapple 16 oz £1.29 .. £10.32 per gallon
Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz £1.19 ………..£9.52 per gallon
Ocean Spray 16 oz £1.25 ……… £10.00 per gallon
Brake Fluid 12 oz £3.15 …… £33.60 per gallon
Vick’s Nyquil 6 oz E8.35 … £178..13 per gallon
Pepto Bismol 4 oz £3.85 . £123.20 per gallon
Tippex 7 oz £1.39 ……. . £5.42 per gallon
And this is the REAL KICKER…
Evian water 9 oz £1.49..£21.19 per gallon! £21.19 for WATER and the buyers don’t even know the source
(Evian spelled backwards is Naive.)
You don’t even want to compare it with perfume or after shave.
Ever wonder why printers are so cheap?
So they have you hooked for the ink.
Someone calculated the cost of the ink at……………..
(you won’t believe it….but it is true……..)
£5,200 a gal… (five thousand two hundred pounds)
So, the next time you’re at the pump,be glad your car doesn’t run on water, or Tippex, Pepto Bismol, Nyquil or God forbid, Printer Ink!
Tags: brake fluid, diet snapple, evian water, god, kicker, lipton ice tea, nyquil, ocean spray, oz, pepto bismol, perfume, perspective, printer ink, printers, tippex, vick
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