Tag Archives: supermarket

Eat This!

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This was pretty good cheesecake from a supermarket.

Father Of My Kids

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Guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says “Hello!!!”. He’s rather taken aback because he can’t place where he knows her from. So he says…”do you know me???”… to which she replies…” I think you’re the father of one of my kids”….

Completely shocked…the guy’s mind travels back to the only time when he was unfaithful to his wife and
says…” My God!… are you the stripper from my bachelor party that i made love to on the pool table???!!”

Confused… she looks into his eyes and says calmly…” No… I am your son’s teacher”

True Story or Urban Myth?

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Chevrolet Blazer 2004Doreen, aged 79, finished all the shopping on her weekly list at the local supermarket. She walked determinedly towards her car which she had left in the car park. There she saw four youths about to drive away in her car. Doreen became agitated and dropping her shopping to the ground, she drew a handgun from her bag and screamed as loud as her lungs would allow at the four miscreants, “I have a gun and I know how to use it. Get out of the car you horrible little men.”The four lads didn’t wait around for a second invitation but got out and ran helter-skelter as far away as they could, whereupon Doreen, somewhat shaken, proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and get into the driver’s seat. As hard as Doreen tried she could not get her key into the ignition. Then it began to dawn on her why.

She came across her own car a few moments later in another row near by. Putting her bags now, into her own car, she drove hesitantly to the nearest Police Station. As Patricia was recounting the tale to the Duty Sergeant she wondered why he kept giggling and smiling. Eventually he pointed to the end of the counter where dear old dizzy Doreen saw four young lads, faces extremely pale, who were describing how a little old lady, some 5 foot tall, wearing glasses and with grey hair had stolen their car by waving a gun at them.

Doreen was not charged with anything.

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