23 Dec 09 The Fate Of G.W Bush
George W. Bush dies.
Obviously he goes to hell, where the Devil is waiting for him.
‘I’m not sure what to do’ says the Devil. ‘You’re on my list, but I have no room for you. As you definitely have to stay here, I’m going to have to let someone else go. I’ve got three folks here who weren’t quite as bad as you. I’ll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I’ll even let you decide who leaves.’
George thought that sounded pretty good, so he agreed.
The Devil opened the first room. In it was Richard Nixon and a large pool of hot water. He kept diving in and climbing out, over and over. Such was his fate in hell. ‘No!’ said George. ‘I don’t think so, I’m not a good swimmer and don’t think I could stay in hot water all day.’
The Devil led him to the next room. In it was Tony Blair with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did wa swing the hammer, time after time. ‘No! I’ve got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I had to do was break rocks all day.’ commented George.
The Devil opened the third door. In it, George saw Bill Clinton lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. George Bush looked at this in disbelief for a while, and finally said , ‘Yeah, I can handle this.’
The Devil smiled and said, ‘OK, Monica, you’re free to Go’!!!!!!
Posted via web from Eyebeemania
Tags: bill clinton, devil, dubya, gw bush, monica lewinsky, tony blair
04 Nov 08 Elections: The Way It Works, Or Doesn’t
The first time I voted was in 1978. I was still the angry young man then. I was still enthusiastic about politics. Years of disappointments with successive administrations hadn’t yet made me cynical of any real change ever happening.
I was in England. It was the General Election when Margaret Thatcher came to power, and the Conservative Party had an eighteen year run in office. I’ve never been what I would call a socialist, but in those days, I did feel that the Government had a responsibility towards the less fortunate in society, before I realized some of the misuse and abuse this creates, so I was very much a campaigning Labour supporter.
After eighteen years of Tory rule, I finally found myself quite excited in 1997 when Tony Blair’s New Labour was elected. My constituency got a Labour MP for the first time since 1951. It was short-lived. New Labour mostly continued the failed policies of the previous Tory administration under John Major. Gordon Brown is about as much use and about as exciting as a wet weekend.
Anyway, I digress. In all the times I voted in the UK, there were, in my experience, ever any long lines. I never waited more than a few minutes.So no-one giving out coffee or food or anything. The polling station was a five minute walk from my house in any case.
There was the opportunity to appoint a proxy, or have a postal ballot, but never any early voting. Polling station opening hours are 7.00am – 10.00pm.
Walk to the returning officer, get a ballot slip, go to a booth, put my cross in the relevant box(es), fold it, walk over to the ballot box (in front of the returning officer) and drop it in. Job done.
The poll watchers aren’t allowed to talk to you on the way in, but I’d give them my name and address on the way out, so they didn’t come knocking on my door later in the evening to get me to go and vote.
It always seemed so simple, and quick.
Tags: angry young man, ballot box, campaigning, conservative party, constituency, disappointments, early voting, gordon brown, john major, labour mp, margaret thatcher, name and address, new labour, poll watchers, polling station, polling stations, returning officer, socialist, tony blair, wet weekend
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