12 Dec 10 Nine Months
John decided to go skiing with his buddy, Keith. So they loaded up John’s minivan and headed north.
After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard.
So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.
‘I realize it’s terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I’m recently widowed,’ she explained. ‘I’m afraid the neighbours will talk if I let you stay in my house.’
‘Don’t worry,’ John said. ‘We’ll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we’ll be gone at first light.’ The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night.
Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way.
They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
But about nine months later, John got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally
determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Keith and asked, ‘Keith, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north about 9 months ago?’
‘Yes, I do.’ Said Keith.
‘Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?’
‘Well, um, yes!,’ Keith said, a little embarrassed about being found out, ‘I have to admit that I did.’
‘And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?’
Keith’s face turned beet red and he said, ‘Yeah, look, I’m sorry, buddy. I’m afraid I did.’ ‘Why do you ask?’
‘She just died and left me everything.’
Tags: 9 months, attractive lady, beet, blizzard, buddy keith, few minutes, minivan, neighbours, nine months, ski holiday, ski weekend, skiing, sleep, sorry buddy, two men, weather out, worry
13 Apr 09 A Pretty Blond Woman
A pretty blond woman is driving down a country road in her new sports
car when something goes wrong and it breaks down. Luckily, she happens
to be near a farmhouse.
She goes up to the farmhouse and knocks on the
door. When the farmer answers, she says to him, “It’s Sunday night and
my car broke down! I don’t know what to do! Can I stay here for the night until tomorrow when I can get some help?”
“Well,” drawls the farmer, “you can stay here, but I don’t want you messin’ with my sons Jed and Luke.”
She looks through the screen door and sees two men standing behind the farmer. She judges them to be in the early twenties. “Okay,” she says.
After they have gone to bed for the night the woman begins to get a little horny just thinking about the two boys in the room next to her. So she quietly goes into their room and says, “Boys, how would you like for me to teach you the ways of the world?”
They say, “Huh?”
She says, “The only thing is, I don’t want to get pregnant, so you have to wear these rubbers.” She puts them on the boys, and the three of them go it all night long.
Forty years later, Jed and Luke are sitting on the front porch, rocking back and forth. Jed says, “Luke?”
Luke says, “Yeah, Jed?”
Jed says, “You remember that blonde woman that came by here about forty years ago and showed us the ways of the world?”
“Yeah,” says Luke, “I remember.”
“Well, do you care if she gets pregnant?” asks Jed.
“Nope,” says Luke, “I reckon not.”
“Me neither,” says Jed, “Let’s take these things off.”
Tags: blond woman, blonde woman, farmhouse, forty years, jed, little horny, luke luke, new sports, rubbers, sitting on the front porch, sports car, two boys, two men
02 Oct 08 This Green & Pleasant Land
Two men have been charged with the murder of a banker who died following a fight in Norwich city center.
Brothers Tom, 21, and Ben Cowles, 20, of Beaumont Road, Costessey, near Norwich, have been charged with the murder of Frank McGarahan, 45.
They are due to appear before magistrates in Norwich on Friday.
Tags: beaumont road, cowles, east anglia, England, magistrates, murder, norwich city, two men
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