06 Aug 09 When English Is Not Your First Language

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Enjoy these gems from around the world:

TOKYO SHOP: Our nylons cost more than common, but you’ll find they are best in the long run.

JAPANESE HOTEL: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, pleas control yourself.

TOKYO CAR RENTAL SHOP:  When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

MAJORCAN SHOP: English well talking. Here speeching American.

LEIPZIG (GERMANY) ELEVATOR: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

BELGRADE (YUGOSLAVIA) ELEVATOR: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

PARIS HOTEL ELEVATOR: Please leave your values at the front desk.

ATHENS HOTEL: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between 9 and 1l. a.m.daily.

YUGOSLAVIAN HOTEL: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

JAPANESE HOTEL: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

SWISS MENU: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

TOKYO HOTEL: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you arenot a person to do such thing is please not to read not is.

BUCHAREST HOTEL: The list is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

MOSCOW HOTEL: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

AUSTRIAN SKI LODGE: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.

POLISH MENU: Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people’s fashion.

Tags: around the world, english is second language, hotel signs, shop signs